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Adam and Clif play Hide the Sausage! |
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TIMELINERound 1DECEMBER 31, 1999 5 pm ADAM PURCHASES PACK OF SMOKES, AEROSOL BATHROOM SPRAY AND MAPLE LEAF VIENNA SAUSAGE. 7:23 pm THE MOTION IS RAISED BY AN ANONYMOUS GUEST THAT AT THE STROKE OF MIDNIGHT, ADAM SHOULD HAVE TO CRACK THE LID AND DOWN THE ENTIRE CAN OF WEINERS. THE MOTION IS HEARTILY SECONDED AND PASSED. 9:15 pm THE SAUSAGES ARE DISCOVERED "MISSING". AT FIRST GUESTS ASSUME THAT THEY WERE MISPLACED IN A FIT OF CAREFREE DRUNKENESS, BUT SLOWLY REALIZE ADAM HIMSELF MAY HAVE HAD SOMETHING TO DO WITH IT. 10:53 pm HURRAY! THE SAUSAGES ARE RECOVERED INTACT IN THE BACK OF THE FREEZER. THE CHALLENGE IS ON AGAIN. BOY, WON'T THAT BE A SIGHT TO WATCH ADAM DOWN THEM WEINERS AT MIDNIGHT! 10:54 pm DRINKING RESUMES AS USUAL. 11:24 pm NO ONE HAS SEEN THE WEINERS LATELY. ADAM HOLDS TO HIS ALIBI. 11:38 pm BELINDA PASSES OUT. 11:52 pm A FRANTIC SEARCH REVEALS NOTHING JANUARY 1, 2000 2:14 pm AFTER GUESTS HAVE BEEN DISPERSED OF, THE CAN IS FOUND LURKING BENEATH A PILE OF T-SHIRTS IN LAMONT'S CLOSET. ROUND ONE: ADAM WINS! |
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What began as a curious purchase ended up as an international scandal and competitive team sport.....thanks in part to this man, Clifton S. Cunningham (seen here with his club being grabbed by a deranged fan during the 7th hole of the indoor mini-golf tournament at the Meat N' Liquor festival of Labour Day 1999.)
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Round 2February 19, 2000 ADAM COMES OVER WITH HIS AUTO-WORKER PAYCHEQUE AND THE FESTIVITIES BEGIN. 7:47 pm THE WEINERS ARE UNVEILED, AND THE MOTION IS AGAIN RAISED FOR ADAM TO DO THE DEED AT MIDNIGHT. ADAM TAKES CONTROL OF THE CAN AND PLACES IT IN HIS LEFT BREAST POCKET. HE AND HIS POCKET ARE WATCHED VERY CAREFULLY FOR A FEW MINUTES, BUT THE BOOZE KEEPS CALLING.... 8:23 pm TEAM CLIF NOTICES THE MISSING WEINERS. HIS REPEATED REQUESTS TO THE REST OF THE GUESTS TO HELP FIND THE SAUSAGES ARE MET WITH BLANK, SULLEN STARES. HE FORMS A SMALL SEARCH PARTY ON HIS OWN. 8:44 pm AHOY! A WITNESS EMERGES! MISS MINARCIN HAS SEEN ADAM ENTERING THE BATHROOM WITH THE SAUSAGE AND RETURNING WITHNOT....THE SAUSAGES ARE SOON FOUND CLEVERLY STASHED BEHIND THE TOILET! 9:13 pm CLIF NOW IN POSSESSION OF THE WEINERS, HE HIDES THEM INSIDE A FURNACE VENT BY THE FRONT DOOR. THE REMAINING GUESTS START TO TAKE AN INTEREST IN THIS BIZARRE SPORT. 9:36 pm NO ONE DISCOVERS THE SAUSAGES, SEVERAL CONFUSING AND CONFLICTING VARIATIONS ON WHO SHOULD EAT THE SAUSAGES IF CERTAIN PEOPLE FIND THEM ARE SUGGESTED, VANESSA GETS VERY EXCITED, TEAMS ARE FORMED, DRINKS ARE DRANK..... 10:53 pm THE SAUSAGES ARE REPORTED DUMPED OUTSIDE ON THE DRIVEWAY. ADAM HAS NO COMMENT. 11:34 pm "WELL, WE COULD GATHER THEM UP, PUT THEM BACK IN THE CAN, AND LIKE...TAPE IT UP OR SOMETHING...AND GIVE IT BACK TO ADAM." 12:19 pm THE ENTIRE AMUSING INCIDENT IS OVERSHADOWED BY STEVE ARMSTRONG DRINKING A HOT CHOCOLATE, EXCEPT A PACKAGE OF KRAFT DINNER CHEESE POWDER WAS USED INSTEAD OF CHOCOLATE. THIS ACTUALLY HAPPENED. |
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