Weeping Gorilla

"I put in Weeping Gorilla because I thought that would be so stupid and I needed more elements that are stupid. I need irrelevant themes I can just throw in and I made a note about Weeping Gorilla..."

Alan Moore        

    The eternally melancholy Weeping Gorilla (as his creator Mr. Alan Moore notes above) is more of an atmospheric element than fully realized character in the ABC title Promethea (although he does appear in the Immateria, a paralell plane of existence where all things imagined are real, and any person encountering him is rendered immobile as all they can do is cry). He is constantly lurking in panels, bemoaning his woes in (typically) one line catchphrases on posters, t-shirts, billboards and even comic book covers. His impact on the people of New York is best summarized with this quote:

"Stacia, he's just a commercial icon who spouts self-pitying catchphrases! He isn't... h-he... Oh God. Oh God, that poor monkey..."
                                                                      Promethea  #3

    Although Alan Moore refers to Weeping Gorilla as a "..irrelevant absurdist element..", I found myself genuinely touched by some of simian's lip trembling remarks... but then again I'm a sucker for a hairy face. Peruse the list of Weeping Gorilla quotes below and see if you're a sap too.

Choke. Modern life makes me feel so alone 

Go on, ask me about my marriage. 

I have some unresolved childhood issues 

I can't believe they fired me

She gets the kids and the house. I get the car

I guess people change

Everyone said I should get Windows 95

Why do pets have to die?

I like country music. It tells the truth

Some days are better than others

What do you mean you need more space?

The garage thinks it's the clutch

I hate my body

Can we hear that Radiohead track just once more?

If I only understood what women wanted...

This should have been my time 

Yes, I'm in telemarketing sales... 

We probably expect too much of George Lucas...  

I guess all the Waltons must be dead by now

Who remaindered the book of love?

Commitment?uh...yeah..that sounds great 

I mean,"Forty." It's just a number, after all... 

I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. This is all my fault 

Sometimes I hurt myself 

Well, no. I didn't vote for him either...

Why can't everybody just, y'know, get along? 

 Why are you so bitter? 

 Oh, man, that was deep. 

Then I told the protestor, "yeah", the fur's real. so What?" 

 Why is there spinach?

Tony the tiger looks...different. 

What hurt me most, though, was the pain 

Both sides have their good points

Why do good things happen to bad people

 There's always Something

    Just a final note; the list above was found at a great Promethea fan site over at http://www.angelfire.com/comics/eroomnala/Promethea.htm . I couldn't possibly take credit for the obvious effort it would have taken to compile such a delightful little list.

Character Biographies