Legion of the Dead
(Olaf Ittenbach; 2000)
(Artisan)
-Overview-
A mysterious blonde-maned man is creating an army of undead followers. Two idiots get kidnapped by a notorious serial killer, and they all seem to end up at a café inhabited by people who turn into freakish monsters. This film is absolutely deplorable. The continuity is next to nil, the humor is retarded at best, and the “plot” is laughable, but not in a good way. I can’t even recommend a rental, because it’s not bad enough for bad film lovers to appreciate. Well, not bad in that way, it’s more like an example of what not to do when making a film. Atrocious.
-Sound-
The soundtrack presented in stereo so you can enjoy the horrible dialogue and stupid jokes. Whee.
-Picture-
Presented in widescreen so you can enjoy the pathetic acting and ridiculous “action” scenes. Yippee.
-Special Features-
I didn’t really keep this on in the DVD player long enough to notice. There’s a trailer or something. Doesn’t make up for what a waste this is.
-Packaging-
Standard DVD packaging. Nothing special.
Sound: 4
Picture: 4
Packaging: 5
Film: 1
(Rating scale is out of 10, with 1 being the worst and 10 the best)