Humongous

(Paul Lynch ;1981)

(Astral Video)

A group of teens plan a vacation on the nearby lake on a beautiful cabin cruiser. When a sudden storm hits, they rescue a local fisherman stranded in his small motorboat. As the weather worsens, the fisherman advises that they anchor behind a small island rumored to be inhabited by a reclusive old woman and her pack of vicious guard dogs. Soon one of the drunken vacationers sets the cruiser adrift and soon they crash into the rocks in the island’s shallow water, stranding the group. Mayhem and off screen kills ensue.

Terrible film, this. The story has promise but the film is so poorly executed that it’s just one jumbled mess. The dialogue is terrible, with the would-be actors fumbling through their lines and just plain being horrible. There’s no gore to speak of and as I mentioned above, most of the deaths are off screen. The sequences that actually offer an on screen montage of carnage are shrouded in almost complete darkness so it’s impossible to make out what exactly is going on. Couple that with an abysmally tiny amount of T&A despite some moderate potential, and we have the trappings of a very dull evening. Avoid.

Overall Score: 2

(Rating scale is out of 5, with 1 being the worst and 5 the best)