This is why...
Need to show your wife or girlfriend how things are done? What better way to show a bitch who's boss? You know he's getting
If you watch horror movies, some of the things that come to mind are, Nightmare On Elm Street, Friday
The 13th, Halloween, and possibly Hellraiser (if you're gay). Now, if you enjoyed Jason hacking people
to bits, or Michael Myers doing the same, then you're boring. All and all, Freddy Kreuger ruled ass!
Why? He completely MIND fucked the shit out of his victims. Jason, and Myers,
just went around killing people because they had bad childhoods and superhuman powers that was ever
explained. They can take surreal beatings, shootings, ass kickings, and exceptionally large falls. They
also possessed Superman strength and do things man could only wish to do. Also, Myers and Jason had super
speed. No matter how far you'd run, or fast, they'd ALWAYS catch you.
Freddy wasn't like that though. Everyone had to sleep, and that's when Freddy would attack. In your dreams.
He would torture you until you died, like Steve Martin.
SCORE!
Abilities: Kill you in your dreams, which means you die in real life.
See the problem here? The bitch is SLEEPING!
Now, Freddy is about to seriously get himself some. He also loves to end his kills with
a psychopathic I-ruined-your-shit-pretty-bad laugh. Sometimes, after he's tortured and maimed
some deserving teenager and they finally die, he says, "aww" like the fun ended too soon (which is completely understandable).
Better hurry to the next teenager Freddy, before they kill themselves while drinking and driving!
Abilities: Unstoppable. Super strength and takes a lickn'.
In this picture, Jason seems lost. Standing in the middle of the street with the same, boring, stupid, dull look
on his face. He looks pissed. I mean horny. No no, I mean happy..oh wait, that's what I always see, because he always
has that hockey mask on!
Abilities: See Jason. Same thing pretty much.
Well, aside from wearing a hockey mask and more hair, this tall drink of water pictured above is pretty much the long lost brother of
Jason Voorhees. HOWEVER, he carries a large kitchen knife, usually stabs people with it like we didn't see it coming after the first 6 people died with
knife wounds in the chest or stomach. Doesn't his facial expression scream he's going to choke this bitch to death? Yeah..can't see
his face either. Sigh.
Abilities: Bad jokes. Big nose. Makes people sniff his fingers.
This exceptionally large bag of douche can be anyone's worst nightmare and nobody is immune to his stylish repertoire. Just LOOK
at the picture. This guy has a thick concentration of boring all around him, so it's hard NOT to commit suicide when you're
around him or watching him crack "funnies" on stage or in film.
Yahoo! Cash 4 Idiots
