Welcome to satsang.

Last week we talked about resistance, and how resistance builds up to a point where we become dysfunctional. It can bring anxiety, panic, and mental and physical illness. Today we are going to see that when we start observing resistance without resisting it, we reach a point of silence. Today the topic is the joy of silence. I would like you to pay attention because it is a powerful and beautiful topic and it will take you a step further than we did last week.

You know, if we were to discuss silence, we would be discussing what is fulfillment, joy, freedom and love. So what is silence? What is the natural feeling of silence? It is connection. I want you to think about a statement and dwell upon it for the rest of the talk, “Just as resistance is separation, so is silence connection.” You will see as we discuss this how everything we want is that connection. When we begin to feel connected, we are home. We realize that we always had it, but there is that expansion of the heart.

Let me give you an example of connection. Suppose there is a little girl with her father, whom she is separated from, so she doesn’t get to spend much time with him. They are walking on the beach hand in hand. Try to visualize this sublimely happy little girl just holding her daddy’s hand and being with him. There is nothing but blue sky over them, seagulls circling, and silence. The little girl turns to her daddy and says, “Daddy, I love you so much.” Her father says in turn, “I love you too, dear.” Now what has happened at that moment? The little girl is acting out of total connection, and her father responds the same way. But what is really happening is simply connection itself.

When we love someone, we think it is that someone who is giving us connection, but the connection is always there. When we begin to feel the expression of that and there is no resistance, we say, “I love you.”

I’ll give you another example. Suppose you go to hear your favorite musical group at a concert, and you sit back, really enjoying the music to the point that it overwhelms you, transporting you into another realm. You feel it and realize, looking at the players at their instruments, that there is no one playing, there is only playing happening. Connection.

One time in India, two men were taking the train to Ramana Maharshi’s ashram. One man was extremely overweight and unhealthy, going to see the master on the advice of a friend. The two became friends on the journey and finally arrived at the ashram where Bhagavan was supposed to be giving darshan. A number of people were also waiting to see him. He was, however, nowhere to be found, so the two men decided to take a walk around the grounds. They came upon Bhagavan sitting on the ground with a monkey on one knee, a squirrel on the other knee, and a donkey nestling his shoulder. He was giving nuts to all in turn, first one, then another, then another, and then himself. The scene was so overwhelmingly peaceful, silent and beautiful that it transformed both the men. They never forgot it for the rest of their lives. Three years later, they met by chance again while traveling. The one man didn’t even recognize the overweight one, as he now looked slim and vibrantly healthy. Seeing Bhagavan in his resplendent silence had changed him forever.

The power of silence is immense. We use words to describe silence, but words fall flat in describing the connection, the feeling of totality, that is beyond the personal self. You feel different when you are in the proximity of someone who feels that connection. So when we are talking about silence, we are talking about total connection with all that is.

Often we attend satsangs like this and have questions, or read books and have questions come up as we read. What is a question? Questions are always in us, as negative emotions such as worry, anxiety, and so on. A question is a quest, a seeking, a need to know. Also within that seeking there is uncertainty, doubt, frustration, even confusion.

But whatever it is, every question is resistance. Subtle. But the moment you ask a question, you begin to release it. The moment you ask a question of a teacher, you look for an answer. Then when the answer is received in words, you feel that something has been revealed, found. But there are no real answers to questions. There are no solutions to human problems. There is only the dissolution of problems and questions. And what is the dissolution? Seeing the silence, connection.

I would like you to picture the following: put your right hand out and grip your fingers together in a vice-like grip, tense, quivering, almost ready to punch. This we will call tension, negativity, seeking, fear, loneliness, depression, despair. That in itself is human - these emotions occur constantly. Now here is something we miss altogether, completely disregard. Picture another hand opposing the first - we will call this resistance to feeling. If you’re feeling lonely, this hand says, “I shouldn’t be feeling lonely! What’s wrong with me? I must try to be better. Maybe if I try this I will escape this feeling.” If there is fear, the hand might say, “I don’t want this fear. This is wrong! I am desperate. I had better seek an answer. I am frightened. I don’t know where to turn.”

What is happening is that these two, opposing each other, are creating what we call emotional suffering. They try to overcome each other - the insanity of it! And that’s what insanity is, what war and violence is, resistance trying to overcome resistance. But when we begin to see this and understand this, we realize that there is nothing to be done, all we need to do is to bring them together, keep on bringing them together and together and together [brings hands gradually to a prayer position] until they become one. This, the hands in prayer, is nothing more than oneness. What is it? Connection.

The moment they are one, that is silence. You don’t fight or resist anything. You don’t deny anything. You don’t run away from anything. You don’t escape anything. You simply embrace the fear and do not resist it. Because the moment you can look at the fear and allow it, that very allowing will annihilate the fear. Why? Because fear is resistance.

So what happens when you allow resistance? The resistance is gone. What is more powerful, allowing or resistance? Allowing. If you enter a dark room, you can fight the darkness, stumbling over furniture, screaming and kicking, but the darkness won’t go away. But if you put on a little bit of light, you can see, and where did the darkness go?

Similarly, if there is fear, bring love into it. Love means connection. The moment you bring in connection and stop resisting the resistance, you leave the fear, frustration and anger alone - they are merely human traits. Nothing needs to be done about them. If you try to do anything, you are opposing it with resistance. That is called dysfunction. So be aware of resistance to resistance, because it is always a chain reaction. Bring it together and you have connection.

So when we ask a question, expressing a quest, a seeking, uncertainty or doubt, a true teacher will not give an answer in words alone. They will say, “What is it you are seeking? What is it that you really want?” Get in touch with what you really, really want, because ultimately all you really want is connection. Please keep listening with your heart, and you will find that all you really want is connection. You might go kayaking and feel so wonderful, so connected, or go hiking and feel so connected to the mountains, to nature, and then you begin to think that kayaking and hiking are giving you the connection. Then what happens is when you go into the city, you don’t feel the connection. You have created opposites again.

But when you find the connection within you, it is not based on anything or anyone. You find it and it’s always there, it’s with you wherever you go. And then it doesn’t matter if it’s raining or whether there is a war raging, because in the world there is no security. We know that from what is happening now, terrorism. There is no security or safety in the world. It’s an insane world, like the Course in Miracles says. All growth is from insanity to sanity, from complexity to simplicity. What is that simplicity? That which has always been. You don’t achieve anything, you don’t go anywhere, you simply realize your connection.

Here is a quote from the Course. “Listen in silence, and do not raise your voice against Him. For he teaches the miracle of oneness, and before His lesson division disappears. Teach like Him here, and you will remember that you have ALWAYS created like your Father. The miracle of creation has never ceased, having the holy stamp of immortality upon it. This is the Will of God for all creation, and all creation joins in willing this.”

When we think of silence, we think of it as the opposite of noise. We can’t help it, because we think in opposites, it’s the nature of the mind. Silence has no opposite, silence IS. It is connection itself. Therefore, if I am feeling fear, I disconnect from myself the moment I try to fix it. Nobody ever told us that’s how it works. The moment you run away or try to remedy it or seek help, you are separating from it. But the moment you experience it, where is it? Feel the fear in your body, get in touch with it, locate it. See what it’s trying to tell you. Then you’ll find that it’s nothing more than some resistance that you didn’t want to look at. The moment you start looking at it, you’ll find that there is only silence.

This means you not only see the resistance we call fear, but also the resistance to trying to overcome it. That is very, very important and most subtle. When you see the totality of that resistance in you, that very seeing itself brings you to silence. Silence, having no opposite, is total connection. And that total connection is what we call love, truth, perfection, beauty, freedom. Silence is everything that we want, everything. It is love and freedom. Ask yourself, “What is it that I really want?” The answer is always connection.

You know, sex is a great thing, isn’t it? Most people love sex - as a matter of fact, you are not very healthy if you don’t. But have you ever asked yourself, what is sex? Connection. But if you do not realize the need for connection, it becomes lust. The moment you want to connect with your partner, not just physically, but with intimacy, it becomes love. See how beautiful that is?

Similarly with everything we want. Sex is obviously one of those things. We might want a family, friends, to belong to a group. This is all the need for connection, we want to connect. When somebody pays attention to you, why do you think that is so pleasurable? Because you want to connect. When you are ignored, it hurts. Why does it hurt? They haven’t done anything to you - maybe they didn’t even know you were there. So why did it hurt? Because you felt you lost the connection.

We all want connection. You know, when people perform on stage and receive applause, they feel fantastic. They get tremendous energy. What is that energy? They feel connected. And why do we applaud? Because applause says, “I connect with you.” [claps hands together several times] Beating the hands together - that’s how we express it. Every expression we have, every feeling, everything we express is this need for connection and an expression of that connection. Our words, our glances, our walk, everything. The moment we feel disconnected from ourselves, the eyes shift. You don’t look straight into people’s eyes any more, even your head goes down. Depression is disconnection, anger is disconnection, worry is disconnection, anxiety is disconnection.

Why do we want to connect? Why is it so important to connect? Please answer. [Someone answers, “An expression of love,”] Why do we need love? Because we are love! We want to connect because we are already connected, but we don’t know it. That’s the difference. All self realization is realizing that. All spiritual awakening is waking up. To what? To that which already IS. But the moment you put something in the future, something you are going to attain or get, it will remain in the future. Do you know what future means? It means it’s always in the future! It’s never now.

Connection is total. Do you know what that means? It means you are either connected or you’re not. Can someone be a little bit pregnant? No, you’re either pregnant or you’re not. Connection is the same way. You can’t be a little bit connected. But that’s what we do with religion and politics, and that’s why we have wars, because we separate. The Mafia is a very close knit family, and they are against everybody else. Most religions are the same way. That’s insane! So what are we doing? We are a little bit connected - we connect with the ego, in other words. But connection has to be total or there is disconnection. It cannot be a little bit connected. You are either one with all, or you are not. But what we do with these little belief systems is to become like a family, separate from the rest, and we disconnect from the whole.

So you might ask, “Well, if everybody wants to connect, and everybody does, why do we have wars, violence, and crime? Why do we have terrorism?” Because they want to connect, but on their own terms, ego terms. In fact, they want to connect so badly that they will be totally connected against the other, but it can’t be done because connection is total. It has to be total.

So when we talk about silence, what are we really saying? Words cannot describe silence, it is indescribable. It cannot be explained or given a definition. But if we were to try to put it in words, we would say that silence is the connection that comes when you are not caught in your own personal being, because the personal being does not know connection.

So how do we find silence? It is very simple - just remember one thing, there is no getting it, there is only being. That is the point. We are always concerned with getting - “I am going to try to be silent. If I practice meditation, I am going to attain silence.” Do you know what that is? Resistance.

So when you say, “I want silence. From now on I am going to be silent,” you put it into the future. Second, you are trying to escape the moment. Third, you are trying to be in control of that which you are, silence itself. These are all about wanting to get, but silence is a being, not a getting.

Here is a quote from Poonjaji. He says, “Keep silent. Keep quiet. Let things happen in front of you and enjoy this universe which is offered to you. If you are silent, there is peace in your mind and you’ll find peace with everybody. If your mind is agitated, you will find agitation everywhere. So first find peace within and you will see this inner peace reflected everywhere else, for you are this very peace.”

How important is silence? Please answer this for yourself. What is the most important thing to you when you are on your deathbed and about to take your last breath? Is it the things you have accumulated, your achievements, or the peace you have? Is it to realize the truth that you are at that moment? That is what is most important, and when we are in our last moments, close to death, if you have accepted your coming demise, you will have a brilliance, a peace in your eyes that can be felt. That is the silence which cannot be defined.

When we talk about silence, the mind thinks about doing nothing and being nothing, and we have definitions of that. No. It is the total energy of connection, that feeling of peace and joy that surpasses understanding, as Jesus said.

From what has been covered, are there any questions? Anything needing elaboration?

Q: I would like to ask if connection is identical to forgiveness.

A: Silence, forgiveness, acceptance, love, they all fall into the same category.

Q: Connection sounds so warm and loving, but for instance to feel connected to the terrorists -

A: No, you cannot do it! You cannot do connection!

Q: Not even to understand where the terrorist is coming from?

A: That is not necessary either, because then it becomes mental.

Q: Maybe “terrorist” is kind of a heavy word to use.

A: The important thing here is that you are trying to be spiritual. Never try to be spiritual. This is what most people do. “I am going to be spiritual therefore I am going to be loving.” “The terrorist did a terrible thing, but I am going to love him anyway.”

Remember one thing - you don’t love or not love. We are all the same, one life. It doesn’t matter what a person does or doesn’t do, we are the same life! It is not a choice whether to love them or not love them. We are the same. They do what they do because they are still in primitive consciousness. Primitive consciousness always separates. That is all the understanding you need.

Many people sent me e-mails asking about what happened on September 11th, the terrorist attack. The point is, people do what they do because they are coming from that particular consciousness. Right now Bush wants retaliation. Can we change that? No, because the consciousness right now is one of revenge. Maybe another hundred years from now or a thousand years from now, there would be too much love to retaliate. Maybe then what we will do is bring twenty million dollars worth of food to Afghanistan instead of fighting and killing innocent women and children, and then they would see that the Taliban is simply creating separation.

So what I am saying is, we do what we do because that’s where the consciousness is. You cannot change what is. Everything has to take its place. So our job is not to try and figure out what is happening, whether something is right or wrong, it’s to see what IS.

Always look at what already is. If we are trying to understand something from the world, why people do what they do, why this happened, we have to go into the mind, and there is no understanding there. Never try to understand, because you won’t! Just go back to what IS at the moment. It is life, and everybody is that one life. It cannot be any other way. Everybody is the same.

Q: So it’s just movement.

A: Movement of energy according to consciousness. Consciousness does everything. If the consciousness is primitive, it will always separate, it is the nature of that consciousness. And separation always brings war, always. And when somebody hurts you, you want revenge. It is the nature of that primitive consciousness. It can’t be helped if survival instinct is in command. There is no good and bad, it’s just the evolutionary process of that consciousness.

But when we come to understand oneness and connection, hurting another is as insane as stepping on your own toes. But it’s not something that you try to figure out, it is something that you come to know beyond a shadow of a doubt. That’s what it means when we say that you are love. It is not an emotional thing. You are love because in your most lonely moments, all you want is to be loved and cared for, to belong, to connect. Where is that coming from? Your own heart.

Therefore, if it’s coming from your own heart, your heart is already that. Recognizing that will give you all the answers. If you go outside yourself to understand this, you are not connecting, you are trying to figure it out, but it can’t be done. All you can do is bring the two opposing parts together, which has always been anyway. When you see the connection, that’s your answer.

Q: I had an interesting experience last week because I was spending a long time looking at resistance and watching how it came up. One thing that has been going through my mind for a long time is this notion of the thinker being the thought, the seeker being the sought, and trying to find the connection there. It struck me at one point that I was just looking at that thought, that the seeker is the sought, and it occurred to me that there is no seeker, that the thought itself is the seeker and the sought, that there is no distance at all between them, absolutely no distance whatsoever.

A: Beautiful. That’s right!

Q: Then there is no ‘me’ observing or looking for, there is just looking, seeing, and feeling. It’s amazing.

A: That’s it. And when you begin to look at the thought, there is no one who is looking, there is just looking. And then you become the looking. That’s how we transcend the ego. We don’t try to get rid of ego! Ego is an idea, just like trying to get rid of a shadow. You see, you cannot. It’s always with you because a shadow is a shadow. So the seeing itself is the silence, the connection. Beautiful.

Q: There is a question here, too. It still seems that there is a part of me that doesn’t believe that. The simplicity of it is so immense. The mind is still turning it over, turning it over, trying to grab it, and then I go back to that thought again and somehow it’s slipped away.

A: You’re still trying to be in control, trying to see. All you have to do is know that there is seeing. There is no one to see. You are still trying to see. I want to know that I know. That is the ego part. There is nothing to know, there just IS. Right now I’m talking to you and I’m moving my hands and doing my thing, there is this body talking, but there is nobody inside this body. There is just consciousness. And the action is taking place, so there is consciousness doing it’s thing. Now, the looking is consciousness. The thought is still consciousness but it’s the content of consciousness. Consciousness is over all.

The moment you make it personal, you create a content, just like software and memory in a computer. When you begin to look at a content, it is consciousness looking at consciousness, but it is looking at the content. And the moment you realize you’re looking, but don’t try to do anything with it, you begin to get glimpses that there’s only looking, nothing else. And there’s no need to find out who is doing the looking, because the one who is trying to figure it out is still the one who is trying to be separate. In connection, there is nothing but being.

Q: Then if we forgive ourselves for being analytical, peace comes right away.

A: Right away. That’s beautiful. And it’s so simple, isn’t it? So simple. Nothing is ever happening. As a matter of fact, the less you do, the clearer things become. That’s what connection is. Connection is making no attempt to do anything except look, because there’s no one looking. So we can say that the one who is looking, if we have to use words, is the connection itself, is the silence itself, is the love and freedom itself. Or if you want to be esoteric or ‘spiritual’, you could say that God is all that there is. God is doing all the looking.

You can use these words, but the moment you start defining something and giving it a label, that label begins to form a concept in your mind and it makes a form. I remember I used to use the word “God” very often and it took a form in my mind. The moment it takes a form, you’re finished. So I use the word “Bhagavan.” Bhagavan is doing everything. Do I see that? Yes, in a way, but I know that that is myself. I have realized that. So there is THAT which is doing everything. So it takes me out of limited thinking.

Q: But the mind is a kind of resistance itself.

A: Oh, yes! Of course, the mind is resistance! Yes, this is what we are saying. Whenever you feel any emotion, anything negative or uncomfortable, that is the movement, the hand going like this [makes clenching motion with hand]. The moment you want to do something with it, to try to figure it out or understand it, there’s the other hand opposing it! [Clenches the first hand with the other hand] And they are going to conflict! That’s called pain. “Oh I don’t understand! I am so confused! Oh, I am going around in circles! Oh, what’s wrong!” No, bring them together [brings palms together gradually] and that’s called satsang. Bring them here and now. That connection is silence itself.

You know, Bhagavan said something very beautiful. I just read it, it is very appropriate to what happened on the 11th of September. He said, “When there is a nightmare, everybody wants to wake up.” So, how do we know that what is going to happen, when this escalates, is not a wake-up call? We need to wake up, and it’s urgent, because the only peace we can ever find, the only real safety and security, is when we are completely within that silence, within that being.

Q: Could you say, too, that tension is a quest for completion?

A: Yes, absolutely.

Q: Otherwise you become caught in the concept you were describing.

A: Yes, All the things that we do are from a desire for connection, everything. Mention anything. Anything you do is a need for connection. If you realize the connection, then there is no longer a need, you become connection itself. Poonjaji, Ramana Maharshi, these are people who are connected. They don’t seek connection, they are connection itself.

Q: Another thing I was looking at, and this is personal but it doesn’t matter, is that I’ve been happily married for many years in a very strong, loving relationship, and there happens to be somebody who has passed through my life very briefly and I have a very strong attraction to this other woman. Now, I am not about to act on it but I am looking at it and seeing what it is, and it does occur to me that it is a kind of resistance.

A: Resisting being with this woman?

Q: Resisting the sense of connection or the feelings I have for this other woman. It strikes me when I look at it because it’s not real and lasting, and when I stop and look at it, it actually seems to disappear, and then it returns again.

A: It will return because I sense that there is still some resistance there.

Q: What is it I am resisting?

A: There is some fear there, naturally. You are married, right? And you are attracted to somebody else. There is a connection there, and you can’t help that connection. The point is, address that connection and accept that connection, and the connection is OK. Now, if you want something pleasurable, like going to bed with her or whatever, then that is all ego. The baser part will always begin to take over. How do we feel connection in the beginning? Through physical attraction. That’s how it comes, in the form of lust. When we begin to recognize connection, already our consciousness has taken a great leap, immediately. We do not recognize this need for connection.

But the moment we begin to realize that we are connected already, then we begin to vibrate with a certain frequency, and the attraction to another could be so strong, it could even feel overwhelming, and make you believe that you are in love. But when you begin to understand what being in love means, connection is being in love, but not necessarily with a person. Being in love IS.

When a person is awakened, he or she is in love with everything. You are in love with a pet, with a flower, with what you are doing, whatever it is. You are in love going for a walk, in love driving your car, you feel that connection all the time, so alive. So when you feel attraction toward a woman, it’s beautiful! But there is no fear with it. You don’t become promiscuous in your mind because that is unnecessary. That is simply not understanding that connection, and you make it personal. When you overcome the personal in that connection, the connection is so beautiful! You know, when I get clients, I feel so connected. I am in love with them! Truly, I love them. I love them dearly, whether male, female, old, young, it doesn’t matter. I feel that connection. But I know that connection is a spiritual thing. I feel I am them, and they are myself.

So the moment you make it personal, needs start to come in the picture, and needs create guilt and separation. The moment guilt comes in, what happens? You try to connect with this one, and then you begin to separate from your wife. You don’t want to, but your thoughts of guilt will separate you. Remember, we do not cheat physically in marriage, we cheat emotionally. If you are with your wife and you are thinking about another woman, you are already cheating, even if you are not with the other woman. So remember, it is connection that is everything. Connection is the thing. And connection is your heart. The moment there is separation from that connection, you are already separating. But you could feel a tremendous love for another woman, and you could go tell your wife about it. And if your wife is awakened like you, she’ll understand.

Q: Is it the ego that sexualizes the connection?

A: Yes! The ego always wants sex. It cannot raise its connection any higher, it wants to keep it on the lower chakras because it’s selfish. “I want, I want to get instead of be.” Sex is beautiful, but there has to be love with it, that connection. So when we begin to have these thoughts, we are actually disconnecting.

Q: So is that what the resistance is? To actually feeling free to connect, and loving that and enjoying that?

A: Resistance is always present, mostly in pleasure, Now why do we want pleasure? We all want pleasure. What is pleasure? The need to connect physically. Drinking, partying, sexual play, there’s nothing wrong with these things, nothing is ever wrong. All that is necessary is heartfelt understanding of connection. So understand the need for connection. When you begin to understand the need for connection, then you break free and you’re no longer afraid of anything because you are one with everything anyway.

And if you have a partner who is on the same level of consciousness like you, you discuss everything with your partner, and that intimacy connects you even more. Then your partner begins to tell you things that blow you away. “Oh, you’re thinking about other women - well, I’m thinking about other men too!” [laughter] Wow, you never thought about that! But boy does it ever bring you closer, because now there is total honesty. Now that’s connection. And when you can be open like that with a partner, you’ll find that the need for the same experience of physical connection dies away, it’s no longer necessary.

This is the point to understand, that connection is always present. When we begin to do it underground, covertly, we begin to suffer guilt. And then you’re not at peace. And whatever you do, get in touch with guilt because guilt eats your heart away. There is nothing more dangerous than guilt. The Course is very strong in saying that too.

And guilt is attractive. That means there is a chain reaction, resistance. “I’ve done something wrong.” And what comes with that? “I feel wrong.” What comes with that? “There is something wrong with me.” What comes with that? Anger, frustration, wanting to get rid of it. So what do you do? You try to blame it on somebody else because you cannot deal with it, it is too much, it is giving you too many sleepless nights, too much inner turmoil. So, you lash out. You create it out of nowhere because you want it out of your system. That’s why people get violent. It builds and builds and builds and they want it out of their system.

Q: I think you just described the whole process of going to war.

A: Yes, that’s right. Now can you stop war from taking place? No, you cannot. The world has to do what the world is ready to do, no more, no less. Bush is a person who likes to think about war. He likes revenge, retaliation. “We’re going to get those terrorists at all costs, even if it costs the lives of countrymen and the lives of innocent women and children.” I am not being political here, I am just saying that if the average consciousness was very high, we would elect a president who is spiritual. But are we ready for that? No, we’re not. Because if we were, we would have elected somebody who has a higher consciousness.

So in other words, everything is as it is because collectively we create it. And it’s all right, we have to go through it. It has to be this way, because this is the way to learn. There is no other way to learn.

Q: Is that pride coming before a fall?

A: Yes. In fact, one of the pain-bodies we mentioned last week is pride, a very strong pain-body. “I am in control, I do it my way. I know best.” There is no ability to surrender, to trust, to allow and forgive. You are simply not capable of that yet. So that’s a pain-body right there. And people who have that pain-body usually don’t live long because they burn themselves out. The heart is too subdued.

Q: In seeking pleasure to make you feel good, could you ask yourself, “Is this real and lasting?”

A: That’s right. Yes, thank you for bringing that up. Always use that phrase, “Is this real and lasting?” Then it brings you automatically to connection. Whatever you are experiencing, always ask that. Then everything that is not real and lasting will fall off. And what remains is nothing that you can name. We can call it silence, we can call it peace, forgiveness, it doesn’t matter. These are just words. We need to use words, but in truth there is nothing that is happening. There is only expansion of connection.

When I expand, I reach out and I am one with you all. Forgiveness, allowing, trust, surrender, peace, joy, freedom, all that is simply extending through connection. And when I feel connected with all, then I am Christ. That’s what Christ means. Jesus became Christ when we was about 30 or so, right? And some people think that Christ is Jesus’ second name, last name. [laughter] Christ is like Buddha. Gautama didn’t become Buddha until he was awakened. Buddha and Christ are one and the same thing. What it means is connection. The truth, light, oneness, totality. Some people call it Krishna consciousness. Krishna consciousness, Christ consciousness, Buddha consciousness, it means total connection, total.

But what happens usually in religion, is that you make it your own, separate from the others, and the moment you make it separate, you lose the connection. Connection is total, 100 percent. There is no 99.9 percent! Connection is total or it doesn’t exist.

Q: In Nisargadatta’s book, “I am That,” he says the same thing.

A: Yes, you cannot name it. And the seeing and the doing and the experiencing is all done by That, but you think you’re doing it.

Q: That is awareness.

A: That is awareness! So when we talk about silence, we are talking about pure awareness. It is doing everything. That’s what awareness is.

Q: Aren’t you talking about completing a circuit, the two hands coming together? The circuit is complete when you are at peace, when you’re completely silent you are plugging into the source, right?

A: Yes. Exactly. You complete the circle and you are plugged into the source. In the beginning you just seek and seek and seek, like T.S. Eliot said, right? You have heard it often enough. “...and you see that place for the first time.” And that’s what awakening is.

We don’t arrive anywhere, we don’t go anyplace, we don’t achieve anything, we don’t get anything at all, we just see what has always been. But when we see it, everything happens through that seeing. There was never a Burt, it was just a name given to a particular form for a particular lifetime. But who Burt is, is energy, awareness that seems to be very personal. Some people have asked, “You mean to tell me that there is no such thing as the individual?” No, there is no individual, but there is a unique expression of life. That is the beautiful thing, the miracle. You are a unique expression and the way that expresses has its own destiny, and it’s beautiful.

We were watching a true story, a movie about a woman who was very wealthy and lived in a large home filled with gorillas, chimpanzees, dogs and cats and everything else. You might say, “Why are some people like that?” She was beautiful and had a loving husband who was a medical doctor, and raising a gorilla right in her home. [laughter] And he just makes one move and the table just flies! And they love it! It’s a true story.

Now, what makes a person like that? Destiny. She’s doing what she’s doing because that’s her unique expression in this lifetime. We do what we do because we can’t help doing what we do. You are THAT. But if you think that YOU are doing it, now you’ve lost the point. Then pride comes in, and there is a fall immediately. You don’t do anything, you just simply express. You don’t even seek connection! Even that you don’t do, it is the heart seeking itself.

Then you simply take time, as there is still the choice to look, and you see that everything is OK as it is. You stop, take a deep breath, and you relax. And in that you find silence, bringing you into the grace of total connection. Total connection is total understanding. but that is everywhere. So if you hear a big bang, that doesn’t mean it’s not silent, because if you were not to resist it, it is silence. The moment you stop resisting, you are silence. That means that the ego is not there. The moment you stop resisting, the ego cannot exist.

Q: Resisting is so automatic. What I do is I tell myself, “Forgive yourself for resisting.” I used to be really hard on myself that way.

A: Yes. And if you find yourself resisting, say, “Thank you,” for making yourself aware of it. When you resist the resistance, we have tension. Be aware when you try to overcome resistance, and smile, laugh at it, and let it be. The moment you do, you’ve connected them both and they dissolve. Dissolving is the real solution. The Course in Miracles says the Holy Spirit is the only answer. What is the Holy Spirit? Silence, dissolution. Dissolution is the only solution. Dissolving a question is the only answer. As long as you think there is an answer, you think you have the answer! But that will automatically raise another question. Did you ever notice? But when you dissolve the question, that’s it, you stop. And in that stopping, you are connected and that becomes the answer.

Q: I’ve heard it said somewhere, too, that the answer is the question. That’s the same thing again, because it’s just that, closer than your breath. It’s right there. As soon as you ask the question, that’s it.

A: That’s it. Find out who the asker is, who is the one asking the question, and then you will find that the question is nothing more than the need to get to know itself. It’s trying to connect. That’s all a question is, a quest. It’s a seeking to connect. And a real teacher or someone who’s aware is one who gives you the answer in such a way that you learn that what you really wanted was to connect. For example, a person might say, “Well, I hear what you’re saying, I read it a hundred times, but I am still disturbed.” I hear that all the time. “Oh, I know what you’re saying, but why don’t I live it?” Now what is that? What is that disturbance that is still there? Disconnection, resistance.

So get in touch with that part in you that is being disturbed. And you’ll find that the disturbed part in you wants an answer in its own terms. It doesn’t want to look at the truth. You have to look at your own resistance. One thing that I used to hear all the time is, “I know this, but how come I don’t feel it?” There’s nothing to feel! [laughter] You are the feeling! Who is saying that? Reality itself.

Let me put it another way. Your eyes see, but maybe you are not sure you have eyes because you can’t see them. The eyes see, but they cannot see themselves. In the same way, I know all these words but I cannot feel my own reality. Who’s saying it? Reality itself! The one who is saying it is reality. So this is why it becomes difficult. The ego wants to experience reality. You cannot experience reality - it is reality that experiences!

Q: It reminds me of the answer looking for the answer.

A: Yes.

Q: It can also be difficult when you get glimpses of reality and then you try to get it back. It makes it very hard.

A: Yes. So when we get glimpses, the one who wants to get back to it is the ego. You cannot get back to that experience because that experience was simply a moment of opening when there was no resistance. Wanting it back is resistance. The point is, why do you want it back? Why does it matter?

Also, people sometimes become disturbed in one form or another. So they say, “I want an answer in order to overcome this disturbance.” Why do you want to overcome your disturbance? Let it be! Let your disturbance be. The moment you allow it to be, it is no more. What is disturbance? It is a seeking to overcome something that triggered it in the first place. That’s the chain reaction. If I want to overcome feeling bad, all I need to do is allow it, then the bad feeling no longer exists. It was never there except in the attempt to get rid of the feeling. So when you allow whatever it is, so what if you feel bad, so what if you feel fear, so what? It’s not you, it’s just experience, energy experiencing through you. You are reality experiencing this humanity, and whatever you go through, just go through it.

Q: What you expect to be, and how you accept it is important to me, to accept everything as it happens.

A: When you say you are going to accept, there is always some result, some outcome that you want from it. For example, let’s say I am going to accept whatever is going to happen. But in my mind, I am saying, “Because if I accept it, it’s going to change, and I want it to change, so how will I accept it in a way that I won’t feel the pain anymore?” Acceptance is total. This means you don’t want it to change. So if there is pain, and you want that pain to change through acceptance, then it’s not acceptance. Acceptance is total. If I have pain, I accept it. It’s OK. Why do I want to change anything?

When you accept life as it comes, then you are letting life decide for you. When you have certain expectations, then you’re not letting life decide for you, you’re telling life how it should be, and that’s the suffering. So the whole point of acceptance is allowing life to be that which it already is. You know, one thing I realized, and actually I realized it just a couple of years ago, is that I am not living life at all. Life is living me. Now this is a big one. The moment you realize it, and I mean realize it, all expectations for an outcome are gone because they don’t mean a thing. And the moment you accept life as it is, life takes care of you automatically like a loving mother. It really takes care of you.

It has nothing to do with complacency - it is dynamic, energetic, alive and joyous! People think that acceptance is a very dead thing, but heavens, it’s the opposite! When a person is totally accepting, it’s not passive, it’s dynamic.

Q: Is it really accepting, or is it that what is, is?

A: Yes, what is, is. Acceptance is just a word. Acceptance is actually the kind of a word that implies a doing. But what is, is.

Q: It’s all words, isn’t it?

A: It’s all words!

Q: It’s a feeling - if you feel that you’re OK, then you’re OK.

A: And you’ve always OK, even if you’re sick or dying, you’re OK. Because you’re here, you’ll always be here.

Q: It’s no resistance.

A: No resistance. The moment all resistance is gone, the ego is gone and you are being lived. Now everything is being taken care of automatically, everything. That’s a fact, a promise, a guarantee. And all beings who have awakened will attest to that. Life takes care of you because you’re not living life, life is living you.

Q: But there should be no need to even explain that.

A: No, there is no need, but when there is resistance, we need to explain, because resistance says, “I do everything. I am the doer, I am the controller, and then I wonder why I am disturbed.” If there is the slightest discomfort, then you are resisting. But if you accept that discomfort, there is no longer any discomfort. See the paradox? So what if there is discomfort? So what if this body is not feeling well? Yes, you say that this is happening, but it doesn’t keep you from being who you are, from doing what you do. You live life anyway. So you move on, and when you do that, you cannot say, “I am suffering.” Suffering cannot exist when you allow life to be. It’s not possible. All suffering is resistance, all suffering is self-created, a form of self-sabotage, self-punishment, victim mentality.

Q: You know, this electric light bulb can only be here because of resistance. You put a coil of wire in there and push this power through that, and it resists. It heats up to white heat and that’s the light.

A: That is so good. I am glad you brought that up because physical life can only appear real through resistance. When you walk, you have to resist gravity in order to make steps.

Q: Perls wrote a book called “The Path of Least Resistance.”

A: Yes, life itself as we know it, life itself is resistance, and that’s why it appears. Now when you begin to non-resist anymore, the world will not appear real the way it used to.

Q: I was wondering about this, because when your intention is brought to a certain point, there is nothing there. No matter what you look at, it disappears, which in a way is saying that there is absolutely no resistance at that point.

A: When there is no resistance at all, the appearance is still there, but you see it as it actually is. It’s an appearance of energy. The moment there is motion, which is resistance, for example a finger that seems solid, but if I move it very fast [moves finger side to side quickly so that it blurs] it appears like a fan, that wide. Similarly, we are a vibration. We are vibrating at a certain frequency, at a certain rate. And because of that, we appear real. You know, one of the things that you come to realize is that when you say, “I am afraid of death,” therefore you believe you are alive now. And because you believe you are alive, you are going to be afraid of death.

But here is the key question, and feel it because it is not something you just accept through words. “Are you alive now?” Sincerely, honestly. really look. Are you alive now? You are probably going to say, “Yes.” And if you say yes, I will say, “What is alive in you?” Really, tell me what is alive in you. You’ll say, “My heart is beating, my blood is circulating, I am experiencing, my cells are changing.” But what is doing that? Your own being, consciousness. But now, is consciousness alive? No, of course not. Consciousness is not alive. Consciousness IS. It knows no time, it just is. Scientists don’t know why an electron moves as it moves, why an atom does what it does, but they know the energy is there. It creates a kidney, a heart, a human being.

Q: That’s life, it’s alive. It’s not dead!

A: No, please listen. We say it’s alive because we are seeing it pulsating, but if something is not seen and it’s pulsating, it is creating what seems to be pulsating. If I have a remote control and I put the thing on, you didn’t see what was in the empty space because it’s outside polarity. We only see things and call them alive because they have opposites and appear real, but they just appear real. Nothing is alive and nothing is dead. It is consciousness appearing as real.

Q: But for the sake of argument, Burt, [laughter] can you call it kind of alive?

A: OK, if you have to call it alive, it is appearing alive, yes.

Q: Versus appearing dead.

A: [laughs] OK, alright. Words.

Q: When you are talking about being alive, you are talking about a thing, like say for example take the chair. I look at the chair and there are wood fibers which are made up of cells which are made up of atoms which is a bunch of empty space, so where is the chair?

A: Exactly. The chair appears alive because the chair is a motion, in motion.

Q: And I gave it the label.

A: Right. The greater the concentration of that energy the more solid it appears. This chair is more solid than my body, so this will outlast my body. A rock has a greater concentration than this wood so it will outlast the chair. Do you get it? But the subtler it is, the more seemingly alive it is. The more dense, the more dead it seems. But the rock is alive! It doesn’t seem to be alive because it is so dense in its concentration of that energy. The subtler the energy, the greater the motion. If you bring a block of ice, it’s solid and real - you can break a leg over it, it can knock you out if it hits you over the head. But leave it in the sun and it melts into water. Water is a subtler form of that same energy, the same thing, and that water can become vapor. Oh, now it’s really subtle, but it’s still the same, it’s moisture. It’s simply changing form. But as it becomes subtle and it seems to disappear, we say it’s not there, it’s dead! There’s no dead or alive, there’s just movement of energy that is appearing.

So if you want to call it alive, yes, but the point is, see the truth of something. What does it mean being alive? What does it mean being dead? Then you’ll find that dead and alive are simply dichotomies, opposites that do not mean anything. They are just words. Everything is just words. All there is, is essentially consciousness, and consciousness is playing all the roles and all the games, and you are free. You are totally free. You are never going to go to heaven or hell - you’re already there right here and now, according to how you think and believe. Consciousness does everything, and the moment you see yourself as consciousness you are free. That’s called being awake, but if you think you are separate and personal then you are disconnected and you are in pain. If you realize you are consciousness playing this role, then you’re free.

Q: So it’s like a stage play. As long as I am here, I play my role and when it’s finished I take my bows and I’m out of here. Then I come back and do it again.

A: That’s right. And as long as you keep believing that it is you who is doing it, then you are going to keep repeating it. But the moment you realize that life is living you, then you are free. And that is love, connection, everything. And you can be free now, this second, the moment you realize you are not living life at all. You are being lived. And every situation that you have, whether you are married or not, whether you have children or pets or not, whether you live in a house or not, whether you are in Vancouver or in Afghanistan, it’s all part of what needs to be in order to learn what you need to learn. And it’s perfect.

Q: And then self-honesty comes in.

A: Self-honesty has to be there. It makes you realize that you are not living life, it is living you. That is self-honesty. And when you think that you are living life, that is dishonesty. And we are always lying. That’s what every human being is doing, lying all the time.

Q: One thing that I feel quite often when I feel connected is that I become very aware of sounds outside, I am really here, and I don’t feel like doing anything. It feels so good not to really do much of anything. Then the thought comes up, “Well, shouldn’t I be doing something?” “I should be going to work.” Obviously I am doing that, but sometimes it’s that nagging thought that maybe I should be doing a little more planning here.

A: That’s always there. But you will find when you realize that life is living you, that your body will act according to that life.

Q: It seems that life will come and get me anyway.

A: Yes, you cannot sit still. You know, sometime someone said something similar to Nisargadatta Maharaj. He said, “You mean I can do nothing and stay in bed all day long?” And he replied, “Try it!” The body won’t allow you to - you begin to develop back aches, you get groggy, and you just want to move. So in other words, the less ego there is, the more you move and the more creative and inspired you become. And when you come to the point where there is absolutely no resistance at all, which is a very advanced stage, then you become a beautiful instrument like a flower. Everything that you do is being done through you.

Q: It seem effortless, is what I am trying to say. If I feel like playing my guitar, I simply get up and play my guitar. I don’t debate over whether I should do this, or put on new strings, I just get up and play. There is a lot less clutter there. Things just happen.

A: Right.