Sweaty Solo Gig

DAVID USHER INTIMATE SOLO GIG HELD AT A SWEAT LODGE

Author: Matt Mernagh
Source: Chart Magazine
URL: www.chartattack.com/damn/2001/07/3109.cfm
Date: July 31, 2001

"It’s hot and stinky in here," was the insightful remark David Usher made last night in Toronto (Monday, July 30) at his intimate Ted’s Wrecking Yard solo showcase. Hot was the big understatement of the night. Taking a sauna with 250 of your closest friends fully clothed was more like it. ChartAttack’s M&M could have set his arms on fire to burn off the alcohol that was sweating out his pores as fast he was pouring it down his throat. He likes his women with a glisten of sweat on them, but only during hot passionate monkey love. Robin "Mr. Fucking" Black remarked, "Sweating is just not cool."

The stage must have been worse with all those lights and stuff. Packed on there were rocker chick goddess Kim Bingham, Jeff Pearce and Kevin Young, who were really Moist from the heat, along with Byron Wong, Gerry Finn, Chris Taylor-Monroe. M&M couldn’t see if anyone else was up there as leggy Sharmaine LeBlu finally came out of hiding and was standing in front of him. Don’t worry, he wasn’t complaining that he couldn’t see. M&M might’ve quipped, "I prefer this view to Usher." For the record he was having a hard time seeing Mudgirl, too.

The women down front weren’t having a hard time ogling the sexy solo hunk, who performed earlier in the morning on Canada AM. Even with Usher being a sweaty mess and who wasn’t last night they seemed more than happy to have him unintentionally drip on them. Yes, they were that close to the man, who was losing weight before our very eyes! M&M suspects that he lost about 10 pounds as his tightly snug jeans became baggy phat pants, so Usher must have lost 15. From the looks of things they both need several home cooked meals.

Usher performed a bevy of numbers off Morning Orbit, along with, we think, a song or two from Little Songs. The only criticism that we can throw at the nicest guy in rock ‘n’ roll was throwing in the Sweet Child O’ Mine medley at the start of the gig. Really he should leave the coke-addled numbers to professionals like Robin Black, who was hanging out on stage. Again, M&M was distracted by Sharmaine and the heat made his brain into a soggy mess, so he’s unsure what the Rock Star was up to.

When the two hooked up at the meet and greet after the set, he forgot to ask Mr. Fucking "What the hell were you doing up there?" Apparently, some members of Moist have also used their talents to help the recording of Robin Black And IRS’ big big debut. About the only artist now missing from the disc is The Tea Party’s Jeff Martin, who usually waits until it’s almost too late before making his grand entrance. Oddly, M&M believed that Gandalf was going to participate on Morning Orbit, but was told that that was false. Lo-and-behold Martin has since sat down and mixed one track.

Several Sharmaine LeBlus accompanied Usher during the quick VIP rounds that included photo, while M&M hooked up with drinking buds, Smoother. Well, just the power section in the band, Adam and James. Rumour has it that the EMI Music Canada marketing department has Smoother playing cards with their faces on it, but we haven’t seen any. To be honest, we’re not sure if we really want to.

We left before things could get even wilder with Robin Black and Double M insisting that they were going to crash the party of Brian Hetherman, one of the guys responsible for making Sugar Jones. Opting for an evening of sanity, we called it a day and left them on their merry way.